Comments on: The Tomgirl Profile: Commonalities among gender-variant or gender non-conforming boys

By: On Zucker « Chartreuse Flamethrower

On Zucker « Chartreuse Flamethrower — Thu, 22 Apr 2010 20:27:45 +0000

[...] Dad came up with a list of tendencies that tomgirls, gender variant boys who may not identify as transgender, show. In another post he also makes a [...]

By: Z

Sat, 06 Mar 2010 13:40:13 +0000

Tomgirl is more realistic and acceptable… But I’ll always have a place in my heart for ‘queengirl’. (explanation- a male cat is a tom, a female cat is a queen, and I’ve always associated ‘tomboy’ with ‘tomcat’. There’s also ‘tom turkey’ but ‘hen girl’ sounds even weirder.)

It’s interesting seeing the ones of those I fit with and the ones of them I don’t. It would be interesting to see how things change as we get better at recognizing “signs your kid is trans” and “signs your kid is GV”.

By: Michelle

Michelle — Tue, 29 Sep 2009 23:33:13 +0000

First, I love the term tomgirl! As a lifelong tomboy, I think it’s time boys had a better label. Oh, and I’m a tomboy with four daughters – I may not be girly, but a couple of them are. I didn’t begin to explore my gender-related difficulties until I was 41. It took me a while to reconcile thinking like a boy, yet giving birth to 4 girls and being a nurturing parent.

I taught preschool in the late 80’s at a day care center. There was an adorable little boy in my class who hogged the My Little Ponies, and always played dress-up with the girls. I didn’t know anything about gender identity – not even my own – then. But I didn’t see what he was hurting. Some of the staff made a big deal of it, but the way I saw it, he was 4. He had preferences, and nobody was going to change that except him.

I can proudly say that my oldest doesn’t freak out when her boys decide to parade around in her high heels or make-up. It’s a form of expressing that other side so many boys have been taught to hide – the feminine side.

So, whatever the ultimate destination on the gender line, I applaud those of you who are accepting of your kids, however they express themselves, and whatever their preferences. I think kids need that freedom to make healthy choices.